Dear Friends:
Finally, my life’s mission has become apparent. It is my job to have at least one conversation with every single human being on the planet. I feel like I made quite a dent today. I didn’t pick this goal at all, it just seems to have been assigned to me, and who am I to argue? I obey. This evening at ye olde coffeeshoppe, I had a painfully, squirmingly-prolonged talk with someone who will go unnamed for legal reasons (because I happen to know for certain that at least one of you is now a true-life officer of the law, and you know who you are, and also, I’d really like to borrow your official cop vehicle for a day or two when I’m visiting, if that’s alright with you, thanks!), but her common nickname contains the word “Crazy”, which is the most well-deserved moniker ever issued, in my newly-formed opinion. I heard her life story no less than five times, but the part that sticks in my head is the explanation of how she finances her life and various eccentricities, as follows:Step 1: Create a fake company.
Step 2: Apply for credit cards under that company’s name.
Step 3: Max out credit cards.
Step 4: Declare bankruptcy. On average, once every three years.
Step 5: Repeat.
Wow. Seriously, wow. She said, “I know it’s dirty, but you gotta do what you gotta do to get by.” No, that’s not dirty. I like dirty; I’m it’s biggest fan. That’s wrong. And illegal. And did I mention wrong? Because most people actually understand the relationship between hard work and living comfortably, and are willing to abide by those basic rules so that others don’t have to cover their fraudulent asses.
People are nuts. That’s why I like them so much.
Jenni
Step 2: Apply for credit cards under that company’s name.
Step 3: Max out credit cards.
Step 4: Declare bankruptcy. On average, once every three years.
Step 5: Repeat.