Hi! I had a talk with the government recently. IRS: Hi, Jenni! You owe us another $2,000! Could you get it to us by September 5? Have a nice day!Me: Uh. Excuse me?IRS: We didn’t get your first quarterly estimated payment a year and a half ago. Could you just send that, with interest? Thanks! Nice talking to you again!Me: ...

Oh my god. Definitive proof I’m no genius! The tortured soul (to say nothing of the emo kid) will cash out his hurt and buy inspiration. I’ve got it all wrong. Whenever I’m sad or depressed or reeling with the random gut-punch, I’m aphasic. My mind is deadened by the emotional barrage, drawn up monosyllabic and trite. Apparently, the world’s ...

Anyhoo. I hate that expression, Minnesotans. Please, please consider refraining. For the last couple work-weeks, I’ve been writing stored procedures and functions that deal with staffing and finance calculations. It’s very complex and the development has been slow-moving, so I hate it. A lot. Anyway, when I get stuck and am awaiting a breakthrough, I’ve taken to folding in half ...

Ok, so. I woke up with a headache this morning. I went to work. Jane tried to convince me to dress up and go to the Renaissance Festival with her. She showed me the outfits she had picked out for me. I threw up. I came home. Chloe looked on in horror as I took the last of her treats ...