So, hey. One last note before vacation. Two things. #1: I OWN A GIANT POCKETKNIFE. I so want to bring this through airport security tomorrow. OK, I won’t. But it’s completely awesome, right? It even opens and closes. The potential for practical jokes is almost unlimited. Also, it’s just good art. #2: THINGS BE GOOD. I guess it’s a good ...

Dear Friends, I had need of supplies for dinner tonight, so over lunch, I ran to Kowalski’s out here in the outer-outer-burbs. It’s the obscenely swank one with the Aveda salon, cooking school, antique shop and such. I was originally impressed with this store because of its huge selection of vegan salads at the deli, but no more. I had ...

Um. Why didn’t anybody tell me about this?? If you have a website, this could be your new pornography. Apparently, I manage to reach almost 10 out of every 1,000,000 internet users every single month. A whole buncha sites link to me, for some reason. I have no popups (which is a lie, since 404lab has a couple). People who ...

Dear Friends, I’m pretty sure I haven’t told you yet that I’m going on vacation Thursday. So now you know. We’re going to Orlando for a week. This is my parents’ xmas present to the family: Mom, Dad, Stephanie, Escobar, Heather, and I are flying down to Florida to see my brother Scott and his family. We’re staying in one ...