{"id":679,"date":"2003-11-15T23:00:00","date_gmt":"2003-11-16T06:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.chocolatemussolini.com\/cm\/default.asp?n=129"},"modified":"2003-11-15T23:00:00","modified_gmt":"2003-11-16T06:00:00","slug":"summing-me-up","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/?p=679","title":{"rendered":"Summing me up"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dear Friends:<\/p>\n

Tonight I was ordered to put on a hat, take off my pants, and take a picture. So I did.<\/p>\n

\n

pants.<\/div>\n

<\/a>I tried to take a picture of the hat, too, this cute Russian army cap Daniel brought me back from Europe, but it didn’t turn out so well. I got half my head, a tiny bit of the hat, and lots of the wall behind me. Which is fine, because I’m really not a hat person at all. There’s something about curly red hair sticking out under the sides of a cap that screams clown, and not in a good way1<\/a><\/sup><\/span>.<\/p>\n

So that reminded me of this idea I had regarding taglines. I want one. <\/p>\n

jenni ripley: not a hat person.<\/i><\/p>\n

Know what I mean? I like this idea. It’s like an email or usenet sig, only it belongs to you, the human, because your name is no longer enough. And you can change it as often as you want, like having business cards you can reprint every day. I think you should be able to wear it somehow. Maybe a little LED display. I don’t care; I’m just the idea person here. Someone else can work out the details.<\/p>\n

Anyway, I think there’s something really beautiful in the act of attempting to sum yourself up in a few words. It’s like an ongoing quest for perfect succinctness. Also, it’s really funny.<\/p>\n

Here are some options I’m considering.<\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: now 20% crabbier!<\/i> 2<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: less talk. more action.<\/i> 3<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: clean underwear daily.<\/i> 4<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: shags like a minx.<\/i> 5<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: talentless hack.<\/i> 6<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: nothing a little bleach won’t handle.<\/i> 7<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/a>jenni ripley: these boots are made for knockin’.<\/i> 8<\/a><\/sup><\/span><\/p>\n

I’m having a lot of fun with this. I was even considering it as my next year-long project once I’m done with my words<\/a>. You know, tagline-of-the-day kinda thing. Then I thought, yeah, another website all about me. That’s a really<\/i> excellent idea, dumbass.<\/p>\n

Jenni
rethinker.<\/i><\/p>\n

\n

<\/a>1<\/a><\/sup> Is there ever a good way to scream ‘clown’? No. There is not.<\/p>\n

<\/a>2<\/a><\/sup> That’s 20% more than the previous day, too. It just keeps growing.<\/p>\n

<\/a>3<\/a><\/sup> For S. C’mon, boy.<\/p>\n

<\/a>4<\/a><\/sup> According to my mother, this is essential.<\/p>\n

<\/a>5<\/a><\/sup> A testimonial, thank you.<\/p>\n

<\/a>6<\/a><\/sup> I went through a bad spell when I was considering this for my business cards. I’m kind of glad I waited.<\/p>\n

<\/a>7<\/a><\/sup> I… don’t know.<\/p>\n

<\/a>8<\/a><\/sup> See, the problem with the taglines is that they require footnotes as well. This is an admitted problem, but a solution is forthcoming.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Friends: Tonight I was ordered to put on a hat, take off my pants, and take a picture. So I did. I tried to take a picture of the hat, too, this cute Russian army cap Daniel brought me back from Europe, but it didn’t turn out so well. I got half my head, …read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-679","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/po9qt-aX","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/679","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=679"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/679\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=679"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=679"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=679"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}