{"id":621,"date":"2004-02-16T23:00:00","date_gmt":"2004-02-17T06:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.chocolatemussolini.com\/cm\/default.asp?n=187"},"modified":"2004-02-16T23:00:00","modified_gmt":"2004-02-17T06:00:00","slug":"hattery","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/?p=621","title":{"rendered":"Hattery"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dear Friends,<\/p>\n

I made a hat! For Alex<\/a>, because he’s going to Canada. Being from Miami, he’s woefully hatless and unprepared, just like when he arrived in Minneapolis wearing only Bermuda shorts and Oakleys.<\/p>\n

Admire it, please. It’s not really that green-and-pink in person, or as pointy. It’s cute, I swear.<\/p>\n

\n

<\/div>\n

Unlike the scarves I made, which when people inquire about them, I say, “Oh god, they’re so<\/i> easy. I knit this one while drunk and asleep behind the wheel of a Greyhound bus to Des Moines.” And I’m lying, but they don’t know that. All they know is it’s easy to knit yourself a scarf, as long as you’re willing to second-mortgage your home to buy the yarn and other supplies.<\/p>\n

But the thing with the hat is that even though I will tell people it’s easy, it wasn’t. It involved three needles in triangle formation, anxiety about the future of the hat, and swearing.<\/p>\n

\n

<\/div>\n

The funny thing is that I only half-know how to knit. You see, there are two stitches: knit and purl. I have only gotten to the first one so far. We’ll cover the rest in class next week. But in the meantime, I am working with exactly half the required knowledge, which is pretty much the story of my life.<\/p>\n

It came out fine, I think. Good enough to declare myself a haberdasher and set up shop, at least.<\/p>\n

\n

<\/div>\n

\n

heather<\/i>: What does that say?
me<\/i>: I’m making a sign for my shop.
heather<\/i>: Huh.
me<\/i>: It’s so easy to go into business around here!
heather:<\/i> …You know I love you for a reason.<\/div>\n

Also, since I have posted three hat photos, it’s only right to give you this special bonus photo<\/a> I took yesterday at the Leinenkugel’s Brewery. I think it’s kind of cool.<\/p>\n

Bye now.
Jenni<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Friends, I made a hat! For Alex, because he’s going to Canada. Being from Miami, he’s woefully hatless and unprepared, just like when he arrived in Minneapolis wearing only Bermuda shorts and Oakleys. Admire it, please. It’s not really that green-and-pink in person, or as pointy. It’s cute, I swear. Unlike the scarves I …read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-621","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/so9qt-hattery","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/621","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=621"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/621\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=621"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=621"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=621"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}