Feliz viernes, amigos.<\/p>\n
When last we spoke, I was headed broomball-shoppingward. I found very sexy shoes<\/a> and my broom<\/a> at Play It Again Sports, a store I hope to never have to return to, as it is staffed by third-string high school quarterbacks with some mysterious ball-scratching disease. I then went to Sports Authority in search of pads and cold-weather clothing (the REI thereabouts sucks, or I’d have gone there instead).<\/p>\n See, my goal with broomball is to not die of cold. Considering how I’ve dealt with the temperatures in the last week, I think this is of utmost priority. I tried on about 18 pairs of snowboarding pants (ranging from medium to extra-large, following a completely random sizing system made up drunk people), and finally found a pair that I liked. I got a long underwear top and bottoms with Technology, and figure I will look at REI for a pair of fleece pants or somesuch, so that I may rock the layers. I’ll be damned if I’m going to wear jeans to broomball.<\/p>\n I also got an awesomely fuzzy hat, and gloves that are both windproof and waterproof. They make my hands sweat even in the out-of-doors, so therefore I believe them to be perfect. I intend to be the least likely frostbite victim on earth.<\/p>\n I went home, gathered my power tools (well, tool: I have a Black and Decker drill), and headed to Matt’s for Cable Installation 2006. What we learned from that experience is as follows:<\/p>\n Eight days later, when Comcast finally decided to allow things to work, I discovered that THEY SHOW LIQUOR ADS ON TV NOW. When did this happen? Also, I’m still wowed by the technology known as DVR. Haha.<\/p>\n Yesterday, I was nearly dead of dryness. Seriously, my legs felt itchy no matter how much lotion I put on them, or how many times I emptied the entire contents of the water cooler into my Camelbak bottle. So immediately after work, I ran to Walgreens and got me the cheapest humidifier I could find. I felt sorry for it, sitting there all feature-free. Its biggest technological advancement is a glow-in-the-dark Walgreens sticker on top so you don’t run into it in the dark. But I don’t need features so much as I need a robot that will put moisture into my atmosphere so that the wearing of pants doesn’t actually hurt<\/em>.<\/p>\n I started it up the second I got home, ran it in the bedroom until I returned from DDR Extravaganza, and then moved it out into the living room overnight. Today, I am happy to announce that I am 40% less likely to die of dessication. And also that I’m not as good at DDR as I used to be, but I can still rock Butterfly on standard. That’s my only goal.<\/p>\n Also also, Jumi’s roommate Josh was talking about going to shoot guns. I told him I’m way better with rifles than handguns. He asked if I wanted to shoot his M-16. I needed a moment alone after that.<\/p>\n And now I am ready for the weekend to begin, although work seems to have other plans for me for the next couple hours. Sometimes tells me I will survive despite this obstacle, for I have much to look forward to. I hope your weekends are equally awesome, dudes. See you next week!<\/p>\n Jenni<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Feliz viernes, amigos. When last we spoke, I was headed broomball-shoppingward. I found very sexy shoes and my broom at Play It Again Sports, a store I hope to never have to return to, as it is staffed by third-string high school quarterbacks with some mysterious ball-scratching disease. I then went to Sports Authority in …read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-256","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-list"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/po9qt-48","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/256","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=256"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/256\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=256"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=256"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/queenofsubtle.com\/cm\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=256"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n